“The Real Weight of Leadership is Emotional�

[clein]

I woke up this morning in a funk. I don’t know if it was something I dreamt last night or what but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I’d dropped the ball. It set the tone for my prayer time – a lot of repenting and a lot of laying the whole thing out before His truthful gaze.

I’ve found that more than anything else it’s the weight of having that “final responsibility� that is the greatest burden of leadership. I find myself wondering if I’m leading these folks off a cliff – or the sheep into a den of hyenas. I can often feel the darkness pressing in and at times I feel like I’m the last one pushing it back with all my strength. The real weight of leadership IS emotional. And I don’t think I’ll escape that but I try.

I have built a team of lay leaders that share the burden with me. They have as much ownership in the outcomes and the ministry as I do. They are as committed as I am. They are an awesome staff. But I’ve found even with other leaders it still comes down to my cell phone in the middle of the night or my nod on that final decision. I “let go� in a thousand small ways. Every area of responsibility picked up by my staff is a great relief. But there are some that I can’t let go off. It’s part of being the shepherd.

Moses must have felt it too. Some days must have been harder than others and yet somehow he knew that God was going to be there the next day. He seemed to know that somehow things would work out and that God would provide and that God would rescue and that God would lead. I don’t think it removed the weight but I think it kept him bringing it back to God all the time.